Dissolution

I stand in the backyard
struck by memory and
the weight of black eyed susans
like everything, less abundant than
the past,

I walk a stilted gait
crippled by the uncertainty
weepy with regrets and
happier times running
reel to reel in the theater
of my mind,

I stumble up the brick steps
through the chastened screen door
to encounter evidence
empty little silver foil packet
repeats, repeats, repeats,
your lack of commitment
absence from the totality of
our lives,

My spine lengthens
bathed in the hot cold anger
my suffering leads me to doubt
reality's hand on my arm
a simple song to hum
in delicate, complex times,
we are unraveling,

A life dissolved
phoenix circling
seeking purchase
a limb to perch on
invite the death,
rebirth.